How to Be More Disciplined – 6 Ways to Master Self Control
How to Be More Disciplined – 6 Ways to Master Self Control
All of us want to change our behaviour so that it will be more aligned with our goals and dreams. To do this we need to focus on three main areas: cultivation of self-discipline, building up of new habits which will make the behaviour automatic, and customization of our environment to remove roadblocks and temptations.
Self-discipline is the first area we need to focus on to create a change in our behaviour. But what is self-discipline and how is it different from motivation? A lot of us get these two terms confused. While motivation is our desire to do something, discipline is our ability to do it irrespective of how we feel about it.
Self-discipline is necessary for anyone who uses ‘I don’t feel like it’ as an excuse. It is the baseline that allows us to act in a way that facilitates our long term goals. No matter how motivated we feel, we won’t get things done if we lack self-discipline. There are six important strategies we can follow to build our self-discipline.
- Focus on identity
The first strategy is a mindset shift that has proved to be very helpful in self-improvement. Some people try to change their behaviour while holding on to their past beliefs. But we should not think of our past behaviour as still a part of us. If we are someone who has quit smoking, we should think of ourselves as a non-smoker and not as a smoker who is trying to quit. When we embrace a change in identity we will find it easier to act in alignment with that change. This is because humans have a compulsion to act consistently with our past decisions. We should start our behaviour change by focusing on the change in identity we want, that is, the internal outcome, instead of focusing on the goal we are trying to achieve, that is, the external outcome.
- Create reminders
We need to have a ‘why’ for our actions to do them consistently. So we should frequently remind ourselves why we want to be self-disciplined in the first place; what our goals are. Writing down our goals or the identity we want on a paper and placing it somewhere where we will see it every day, will remind us that this is why we are building our self-discipline; this is what we are doing all the work for.
- Embrace the suck
The third strategy is to find ways to embrace the discomfort and resistance we feel about doing something difficult or unpleasant. Every time we embrace discomfort we are making ourselves better at dealing with discomfort in the future. We should find ways to embrace discomfort throughout the day, like taking a cold shower, taking the stairs instead of the elevator, or anything that makes our brain go “I don’t feel like it”. The more discomfort we embrace, the more unbothered we become of it.
- Target the fundamentals
The fundamentals include our biological necessities; our sleep, our nutrition, and our exercise. We are a collection of biological systems, which requires the right inputs for the best outputs. The part of our brain that handles our desires and impulses requires a lot of energy and rest to function efficiently. The brain is not a separate entity that can function on motivation and determination alone. It needs rest, exercise, and the right balance of nutrients just like the rest of our body. So, if we are sleep deprived, not getting enough exercise or do not have a balanced diet, then we should start our self-discipline from there.
- Practice Zazen
It has been scientifically proven that meditation can help us improve our self-discipline. One way to get started is through guided meditation. There are several apps and YouTube videos that can help us with this. But the form of meditation better suited to develop self-discipline is Zazen meditation. It requires us to close our eyes and control our breathing. If we find ourselves distracted by a random thought we should take care to bring our focus back to our breath. Over time, this practice will increase our self-discipline as well as concentration.
- Build habits
The final strategy is to build new habits. Although building a new habit is a separate area of behaviour change in itself, the initial stages of it require self-discipline because the habit is not automatic yet. But we should keep in mind that whatever habit we choose to build, we should start small and keep track of our progress. We should also not focus on a clean streak; rather we can celebrate our small wins if our trend is going in the generally positive direction. As we are building a new habit we will also be improving our self-discipline.
Self-discipline is an important aspect of reaching our goals. It is what forces us to do things even when we don’t want to and will put us one step closer to success. So, it is important to develop self-discipline and these six strategies do exactly that.
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